Ifyoure-mailaddressendsin".over.yonder.com", IfyouconnecttotheWorldWideWebviaa"DownHomePage", Ifthebumperstickeronyourtrucksays"Myothercomputerisalaptop", Ifyourlaptophasastickerthatsays"ProtectedbySmithandWesson", "Ifyouveeverdoubledthevalueofyourtruckbyinstallingacellularphone.", Ifyourbaseballcapreads"AOLSucks!"insteadof"CAT", Ifyourcomputerisworthmorethanallyourcarscombined, Ifyourwifesaid"eithersheorthecomputerhadtogo",andyoustilldon\tmissher, "IfyouveeverusedanAOLCD-ROMasacoastertosetyourbeeron", Ifyoueverrefertoyourcomputeras"OleBessy"or"Darlin", Ifyourscreensaverisabitmapimageofyourfavoritetruck,tractor,orpornostar, Ifyoustartallyoure-mailswiththewords"Howdyya’ll"or"HeyBubba"