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You Might Be a Redneck!
You Might Be a Redneck!

"Whatsthelastthingyouusuallyhearbeforearedneckdies?Heyyall...Watchthis!", HowToPickUpAChickInArkansas:HeyBaby!Nicetooth., "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youthinkthelastthreewordsofthenationalanthemisstartyourengines.", YouMightBeARedneckIf...Fifthgradewasthebestsixyearsofyourlife., YouMightBeARedneckIf...Oneofyourkidswasbornonapooltable., YouMightBeARedneckIf...Ifyourefertothefifthgradeas,"yoursenioryear"., YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youthinkthestockmarkethasfencearoundit., Youknowyeraredneckwhenyoutakealoadtothedumpandbringbackmorethanyoutook., "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youveeverbeeninvolvedinacustodyfightoverahuntingdog.", "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Yourgrandfatherdiedandlefteverythingtohiswidow...butshecanttouchittilshesfourteen.", YouMightBeARedneckIf...Thefigurinesontopyourweddingcakewerewearingoveralls., YouMightBeARedneckIf...Yourfavoriterestauranthasasawdustfloor, "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youveeverburpedandkilledafly", YouMightBeARedneckIf...Thereweredogsinthechurchonyourweddingday, "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youresavinguptogravelyourdriveway.", "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youveeverboughtausedcap.", "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youturnthesprinkleronandtellthekidsitsawaterpark.", "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youveeverhadtohaveawreckerpullyourcaroutofapotholeinyourdriveway.", YouMightBeARedneckIf...YourweddingcakewasmadebySarahLee, "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youveeverhadadreamaboutbeefjerky.", YouMightBeARedneckIf...Winn-Dixiecateredyourwedding., YouMightBeARedneckIf...YournotactuallyabletoreadtheRichardPettyStory,butyousureliketolookatthepictures., "YouMightBeARedneckIf...Youveevertriedtopassanentirefuneralprocession.", YouMightBeARedneckIf...Yourdrivingavehiclewithnooriginalbodyparts., YouMightBeARedneckIf...Inpreparationforaromanticevening,youstopbythegrocerystoreforabottleofMr.Bubble., YouMightBeARedneckIf...Thefireworksstandgivesyouavolumediscount.

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